Manny Ramirez & The Greatest Contract of All Time

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Manny Ramirez Contract

I often wonder about the motivation behind MLB vets going overseas at the end of their career to play ball. MLB’ers aren’t as prone to going broke as athletes from the NBA and NFL for whatever reason, so who the hell wants to go play ball in Japan? Retire and start golfing.

That was all until the details of Manny Ramirez’s contract leaked.

Late last year, one of the greatest right handed hitters in MLB history signed a contract to play for the Kochi Island Fighting Dogs of the Shikoku Island League in Japan. Odd move to say the least. But check out some of these perks in his contract with the team.

  • Full use of a Mercedes, including a personal driver

What’s better than driving a nice car? Having someone to drive you around in a nice car. Imagine the number of late night Taco Bell runs you’d make.




  • Practice is optional

We in here talkin ’bout practice?! Manny only has to show up to practice when he wants to. I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say that might be about 0 times a week.

  • His own hotel suite on the road

This one is obvious. You can’t stick baseball royalty in the same room with peasants. They won’t admit it but I guarantee he can order all the free porn he wants in the suite.

  • Unlimited sushi for the entire season

This one is actually disgusting to think about. I enjoy sushi like once every 3 years when I’m in a place I feel comfortable ordering sushi (not here in Cleveland). How much sushi could you possibly pound to put this in your contract?

  • “Manny” on the pack of his #99 jersey

All these perks are great, but this one is the most Manny Ramirez perk of them all. 

According to multiple websites (filtered through Google translate), Ramirez suggested that he was motivated to resume his playing career in Japan out of his love of the game and desire to share that passion with the fans of Japan.

This is the only way I can imagine Manny Ramirez ending his baseball career. Just Manny being Manny, folks.