“Chicago White Sox first baseman Jose Abreu told a Miami federal jury Wednesday that he ate a chunk of a fake passport while flying to the U.S. to cover up his illegal travel as part of a Cuban ballplayer smuggling operation.”
Abreu testified that he ordered a beer on an Air France flight from Haiti to Miami and slowly consumed the page containing a false name and his photo. Abreu said he traveled illegally because he was worried he would miss an October 2013 deadline and lose the $68 million contract he later signed with Chicago.
“If I had not been there on that particular day, the deadline, then the contract would not be executed and would no longer be valid,” Abreu told jurors. “We had to be in Chicago to sign the contract.”
Bizarre story here, but you gotta applaud the effort. I’d do some questionable things for $68 million, and let me tell you that eating a fake passport is somewhere in the middle of that spectrum. I’d let Giancarlo Stanton hit a ball off the tee right into my back. I’d fly across home plate while Randy Johnson was ready to deliver a heater. I’d even spend an entire hour locked in a room with Trevor Bauer.